One year anniversary . . .

Today is Anam Cara's One year Anniversary . . . although I have not been as disciplined as I had hoped in blogging nor has the blog had much, if any traffic, it has served, and is serving, its purpose well . . . it is a place where I can share my thoughts as I continue the journey of spiritual growth.

In thinking over the past year, it has been an amazing time of spiritual growth for me as well as for the smaller membership church which I partner with . . . although we have not seen the numerical growth for which we have been praying . . . in fact the opposite is happening as members continue to leave this area as they grow older so to avoid nasty evacuations and to be closer to their families . . . but we are now getting visitors who are sticking . . . and more than this we have people who are really going deeper and further in their spiritual lives . . . it is revealed in how we are living with one another in more healthy ways.

I give thanks to God for God's claim on my life and God calling me to partner with this group of pilgrims living on the banks of the Mighty River . . . may our lives together bring You honor and glory as we live in the freedom that we have been given through Your Son, Jesus Christ.

Lydia

Over at St. Casserole's Blog she reminds us that she has celebrated 31 years as an ordained Minister of Word and Sacrament . . . in the work I am doing with our transformational consultant I am exploring the concept of spiritual mentoring. I am reading a wonderful book . . . not the one that he is having the small group I am in read . . . I am drawn to it in a way that I am not to the one he is having us read . . . as I savor the pages, I recall all the women in my life who have been spiritual mentors and spiritual friends (anam caras) to me . . . I take delight and joy in counting St. Casserole among these.

Fresh out of seminary she was called as the Associate Pastor to the church I attended while going to college. St. Casserole was the first female minister I had met . . . I had heard tales, but had never actually met one of these strange and mysterious creatures. I didn't know her well back then, but how I loved seeing her in action . . . her first baptism in that church (was it her first? probably) . . . how different it was than the ones I had seen before . . . what was it? . . . I now recognize it as her abounding grace and love for God's children and the joy she experiences as she touches others for and is touched by God in such simple ways.

It was through St. Casserole my own call to ordained ministry was confirmed . . . I had first heard God's call when I was six, but didn't know to what . . . God issued the call again that Sunday when I saw St. Casserole baptize that baby and bring her into the congregation. It took close to two decades to get to seminary as my pastor didn't think God was calling me to be a MOWS . . . funny, how he divorced his wife after she accepted God's call to ordained ministry.

Years later another female MOWS helped reframe this experience for me . . . God had other things for me to learn. This month I begin my 11th year of ordained ministry.

I give thanks and praise to all those women who paved the way . . . perhaps, one day we will understand what it means to see like God does . . . There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. Galatians 3: 28 (NIV)

Lydia

Summertime . . .

Summer technically begins tomorrow, but temperatures down in this neck of the woods are already in the mid-90's with heat indexes in the 100's . . . estimated to be 110 today.



When I woke up this morning "Summertime" was playing in my head . . . I am not sure the reason . . . yes, I love the song . . . yes, it is hot . . . yes, summer starts tomorrow . . . but as I sang the words along with the radio in my head these words seemed to stand out, "but until that morning, there's nothing can harm you with your daddy and your momma standing by" . . . I wonder -- I know it sounds strange, if this song doesn't resonant with me as it reminds me of God's providential care . . . perhaps, this is a stretch, but this is what sings in my heart this morning . . . how wonderful to realize that I have a Heavenly Parent who is with me even in the heat of life -- and in the heat of life I am not referring to temperature, but those times in life that cause us to struggle . . . God is always with us . . . protecting, guiding, and comforting and even cooling us off when we heat up.


Summertime,
And the livin' is easy
Fish are jumpin'
And the cotton is high

One of these mornings
You're going to rise up singing
Then you'll spread your wings
And you'll take to the sky

But until that morning
There's a'nothing can harm you
With your daddy and mammy standing by


God's blessings on you,


Lydia

Taking the plunge . . .

Well, I did it . . . after more than a year of thinking about it I purchased a new car Friday . . . I chose to buy a hybrid . . . hoping in some small way I am being a better steward of the resources God has entrusted to us.

Lydia

Deep Peace to You

Deep peace of the running wave to you.

Deep peace of the flowing air to you.

Deep peace of the quiet earth to you.

Deep peace of the shining stars to you.

Deep peace of the Prince of Peace to you.

Lydia

Running on empty . . .

For the past several weeks I have felt as if I were "running on empty" . . . actually, one of my favorite Jackson Browne's songs . . . Late for the Sky album . . . yes, I know that this dates me and no I was not 17 in 65! The chorus goes

Running on - running on empty

Running on - running blind

Running on - running into the sun

But I'm running behind

When we began our intentional transformational process and we were challenged to come up with a vision this song started playing in my head. It wasn't so much about me then . . . it was about the yearning all around me that I sense for something more . . . and that something more is really Someone -- I believe there is a strong yearning in people to be refreshed by the the Living Water. When I shared this folks they laughed . . . "let's put an old gas pump out in front of the church with a sign, 'Let us fill you up with Jesus' . . . and as I have thought about this off and on over the course of the following 18 months I have thought that perhaps a better image is an old water pump.

In '69 I was still a kid . . . Hurricane Camille came rushing ashore of the Mississippi Gulf Coast. We were stuck at home without water and electricity for a couple of weeks . . . my Daddy use to load us up in our borrowed Mustang . . . great family car! . . . but two of the family cars were lost to the water . . . although the other one floated --VW bug, in the garage, it didn't run . . . and we would go to the artesian well pump two blocks east of our house . . . it has long since been recapped . . . but I still remember those hot muggy days when we would go over to fill gallon jugs . . . I remember drinking that cool, rushing water . . . feeling it wash over my head as I would wash my hair . . . as I remember it either there weren't many folks in town at that time or folks didn't know about the pump . . . I didn't know about it until my Daddy took me over there.

In these past several weeks I have been longing for refreshing waters . . . I found them this weekend at a Worship Renewal Weekend . . . just as the gushing waters from that artesian well refreshed me after the Hurricane Camille the Living Water that flowed during this Worship Renewal Weekend refreshed me in a much needed way . . . it slowed me down . . . helping me to remind me that (wo)man's chief end in life is to to glorify God, and to enjoy God for ever. Sometimes in the hustle and bustle of even God's work in the local church we tend to forget this and God has to remind us to slow down, to be still and know that God is God.

Thank you God for filling me up this weekend.

Lydia

New thoughts . . .

It is hard to believe how long it has been since I have added a post . . . 

Recently I  have joined a small group from across our presbytery who are doing advanced training in transformational ministry. One of the men in the group asked what our experiences have been with transformational ministry.  The church I partner with is now 18 months into the process . . . this was my response to him. 

Emotionally my experiences have run the gamut from immense frustration to immense joy, but I think now I have learned to be content knowing that it is not about me . . . although, paradoxically, it is about me . . . it is about me being willing to be open to the HS working to help me go deeper and further with Jesus and through me to help others go deeper and further with Jesus. 

Honesty . . .  I didn’t realize my need to go deeper and further with Jesus . . . after all, I am a MOWS!!  A large part of my growth has led me to get off the emotional roller coaster although again in all honesty I still find myself booking a ticket on certain days, but more often than not I don't get on. 

If truth be told the  greatest emotion I had to overcome was fear . . . fear of people not liking me, fear of making people unhappy.  A huge debt of gratitude goes to Tom for helping me reach this place. Interestingly . . . 

there was/is a lot of fear in this community of faith about the process of transformation . . . even the word transformation is fearful for some people here and although Tom gave us other names transformation is very Biblical and I won’t shrink from using the word. But I am couching the word in love and grace and gentleness. 

I haven’t quite figured out the origins of this fear – on the surface, it may be related to the Presbyterian mantra “we have always done it this way” or it may be related to the real possibility that transformation will bring changes in leadership (which we are already seeing), but I am wondering more if the fear is not related to having to look, assess and perhaps find that their own relationship with Jesus is lacking.

I don’t want to be critical of this congregation, especially as I don’t think they are much different than most mainline congregations, but the sad fact is that it hasn’t been about Jesus . . .  it has been about “us.”  Yet, almost every day I see this is changing . . .  in individual lives and by extension in the congregation as a whole.  

Without wanting to sound like an egomaniac it began with me -- really, rather than egomaniac,  it was about me growing more into having and living with a servant heart . . . with my own willingness to invest more than I thought I would and could.  Although it can be energy draining in a physical sense, paradoxically it has also been life-affirming.  God has blessed me with good friends, both near and far, who keep before me my need for self-care.  This is a key – self care.

At one point, late last year, for me self-care meant stepping away for awhile from doing transformational ministry (about three months) to make room for more intense prayer, study and planning for transformational ministry. I came back re-energized and recommitted because this is what I believe God desires for this church.  It was after this break that I was able to see little blossoms of spiritual growth everywhere.  It isn’t huge growth but it is growth and this growth is bringing hope to a congregation that I really believe has been living in a fog of hopelessness for many, many years. 

Peace, 

Lydia