Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Long silence . . .

I am not sure why the long silence . . . well, yes, it is Face Book . . . another venue for a cyber presence . . . but one that does not allow anonymity or at least how I set it up . . . here I have this so can share more fully.

I am no longer at the smaller membership church where I had served for five years . . . few probably would have noticed that my last Sunday was my 5th Anniversary with the church. What happened? I guess there could be many answers to that question . . . bottom line is it was time . . . as one of the Elders said to me on 2 occasions misquoting Scripture -- if they don't accept you shake the dust off your feet and leave . . . after three years of working with a church consult it was obvious that our understanding of church and what God calls the church to be and do were entirely different . . . and there were "controllers" . . . one who was not happy -- of course the church exists to make her happy . . . the other "I" offended when it was decided by the co-ordinator of the CE Program that her daughter should not continue to teach Sunday School as she was openly involved in an extramarital affair (the Sunday before my last I learn she is pregnant by this man -- this will be her third child born outside of marriage).

I am now in therapy, again -- third time since being associated with this congregation . . . it is powerful stuff . . . one of the amazing insights is that being in this dysfunctional congregation surfaced for me many family of origin issues leading me to be less effective than I could have been . . . however, out of this I am dealing with these issues . . . learning about myself and working to change behaviors that for the last five years have not served me well . . . so out of chaos has come hope and renewal.

God is good . . . the church negotiated a very generous settlement knowing that it takes 6 to 18 months for a person to find a new position . . . God is good . . . on August 30th I begin a year long residency in Clinical Pastoral Education in the Metro New Orleans area . . . a new position with a move across the River . . . it is an exciting and busy time . . . what happens after this year? . . . I don't know, but I know that God will provide as I partner with God in living within His plan for my life.

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